To see previous "To Whom It May Concern" entries look here and here.
Dear Sick People,
Stay home. The world is not going to stop spinning because you had to stay home from work. It it better for everyone if you snot and sneeze in your own house. If you insist on coming to work, please do not walk up and down the hallways coughing into every open door you see. Can I interest you in a mask and some antibacterial gel? This is a hospital for goodness sake - we're not in short supply.
Sincerely,
Mrs. First Door on the Right
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To Heather and Jenny,
Thanks for watching us last weekend. We enjoyed our time with you. Come back to visit anytime you want. Sorry about the toaster oven. Mommy should have told you about it before she left.
From,
Carhartt and Sheena
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Dear Bugs,
I guess we showed you! I know that you are God's creation and most of you are good for something. However, you are not welcome in my home. You are free to enjoy the vast surrounding area (except mosquitoes - you are evil and should die), but the indoor space is off limits. If you continue to violate this request, you will be executed like the others. I trust you'll make the right decision.
Regards,
Mrs. I Have Poison and I'm Not Afraid to Use It
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Dear Delta,
I'm sorry I bad-mouthed you about making us walk from the far end of the terminal just to turn right around and go back through the same gate. You thought ahead and made it very easy for us to catch our connecting flight. I shouldn't have been so quick to judge.
I also commend you for the yummy cookies you provide in addition to peanuts.
Sincerely,
Grateful Passenger
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Dear Nampa,
You're getting so big (relatively speaking). John says you're not as smelly as he was led to believe. I tried to tell him you were just having a good day.
By the way, your mayor can really rock.
From,
The Lady in the Obnoxious Red Rental Car
Dear Sick People,
Stay home. The world is not going to stop spinning because you had to stay home from work. It it better for everyone if you snot and sneeze in your own house. If you insist on coming to work, please do not walk up and down the hallways coughing into every open door you see. Can I interest you in a mask and some antibacterial gel? This is a hospital for goodness sake - we're not in short supply.
Sincerely,
Mrs. First Door on the Right
*****************************************************
To Heather and Jenny,
Thanks for watching us last weekend. We enjoyed our time with you. Come back to visit anytime you want. Sorry about the toaster oven. Mommy should have told you about it before she left.
From,
Carhartt and Sheena
*****************************************************
Dear Bugs,
I guess we showed you! I know that you are God's creation and most of you are good for something. However, you are not welcome in my home. You are free to enjoy the vast surrounding area (except mosquitoes - you are evil and should die), but the indoor space is off limits. If you continue to violate this request, you will be executed like the others. I trust you'll make the right decision.
Regards,
Mrs. I Have Poison and I'm Not Afraid to Use It
*****************************************************
Dear Delta,
I'm sorry I bad-mouthed you about making us walk from the far end of the terminal just to turn right around and go back through the same gate. You thought ahead and made it very easy for us to catch our connecting flight. I shouldn't have been so quick to judge.
I also commend you for the yummy cookies you provide in addition to peanuts.
Sincerely,
Grateful Passenger
****************************************************
Dear Nampa,You're getting so big (relatively speaking). John says you're not as smelly as he was led to believe. I tried to tell him you were just having a good day.
By the way, your mayor can really rock.
From,
The Lady in the Obnoxious Red Rental Car
9:06 PM
Ummm...why does the mayor rock? This sounds like a story I should hear about!!
9:09 PM
Oh and tell John that he was very lucky that he visited when Nampa was not smelly! If you need someone to verify your "Nampa is very smelly statement" to him have him call me!! :)
9:38 PM
Thank you! Everyone kept telling John that the smell was usually much worse. I appreciate the support.
During the closing bonfire they had a band playing. The lead singer was the mayor of Nampa. They were actually pretty good and some people even broke out and...shhhh...(wisper) danced.
We missed you.
3:17 PM
yeah Nampa!
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